6 Excuses That Could Be Sabotaging Your Success

When you're faced with a big challenge, does it excite you or do you immediately get scared and convince yourself that it's probably a bad idea?

If you ever try and talk yourself out of conquering a challenge or task that will help you grow, it may be that your mind is playing tricks on you!

You see, when we try to get outside of our comfort zone, our mind immediately tries to settle us back into 'the known' at all costs. This can halt our personal growth, sabotage our wellbeing, and even cause us to miss great opportunities.

So how do you know if your mind is playing tricks on you? Below are 6 excuses you may be telling yourself to justify that it's okay not to take a challenge to change, ultimately leaving you stuck right where you are.

Do any of them sound familiar? Let's find out:

Excuse 1. It's not my fault.

You think that your success, failure or current situation depends on the circumstances around you. So you think... 'the reason I'm stuck in this job is because my parents didn't send me to the right college' or 'the reason that I don't look like I want to is due to genetics' or 'I was born like this so there's nothing I can do about it.'

Excuse 2. I can't live without my ____.

You can fill in the blank with: coffee, soda, fav TV show, car, etc. All of these are examples of things you may have convinced yourself you need and simply can't live, or progress in life, without.

Excuse 3. Life is meant to be enjoyed, it shouldn't be hard.

Of course there is truth to this, however if you're just using this statement to justify your unhealthy habits like eating a full box of donuts by yourself because 'life is meant to be enjoyed', then most likely it's an excuse your mind is creating to sabotage your wellbeing.

Excuse 4. One time won't hurt.

This is a tough one for most people, as we tend to think... 'one bite of that cheese cake won't count', or 'one time I miss working out, won't hurt'... but is it really going to be just once?

Unfortunately, most of the time, it's really not. One thing leads to another; so unless you're very strong minded and determined, don't risk yourself by believing the 'one time' excuse.

Excuse 5. I'm too tired.

Really? Well, guess what... me too! But I still woke up early and went to the gym, did my morning meditation and set my day up for success.

The important thing here is to really know the difference between when your body truly needs to rest and when your mind is telling you to avoid an uncomfortable situation.

Just think about how, despite being really tired, you still would find energy to go out with someone you really liked if you had to.

Excuse 6. I deserve this 'bad thing.'

It's true that you might deserve a break or a reward, but if you make this your everyday rule, then you'll always end up giving yourself rewards rather than working towards what you truly want in life.

So... how did you go? Did any of them sound familiar?

If you found that you've used these excuses more than once, don't beat yourself up... there's nothing wrong with giving in once in a while.

What's most important is that you learn your limits and keep progressing toward the life you desire and deserve, despite the nagging little voice that may pop up in your head telling you otherwise!


http://www.mindmovies.com/blogroll/post.php?id=147

A Few Lessons From Shock and Disappointment

 

Just last week, I did the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge.

My video was more than three minutes long. I didn’t just film myself dumping a bucket of ice and water on me. I had something to say about the nature of the challenge and how some people were making dismissive and even negative comments on it.

You see, my dad died from ALS when I was only 20.

I took up the challenge on my own without being nominated by anybody.

And yep, to be perfectly honest, I was hoping that my message, given where I was coming from would resonate with all of my friends and that they’d be inspired by me.

I also most certainly expected all of those I nominated to take up the challenge.

But alas, although I knew deep down that I couldn’t force others to see eye to eye with me, deeper down, I was very disappointed with a couple of reactions I got.

One friend replied me, “Haha I don’t give a sh*t bro” when I joked with him asking when he was going to do it.

Another friend was all like, “You donated $100? Do you know how much money actually goes to the CEOs bro? Do you know how much actually goes to ALS research? Do you blah blah blah bro?”

I was aghast.

I didn’t think that my own friends would be do dismissive towards something so important to me. I didn’t think they’d believe everything they read on the internet (because reading up on where ALS donations end up at supposedly makes you smarter than the majority who did the challenge.)

Perhaps it has just been me, but then again, it is definitely about me as I can get very sensitive towards expecting others to make what seems to be obviously the correct choice.

That’s the thing about life.

You may think you’re doing the right thing or that you may think you’ve done something so awesome and inspiring that you expect everyone else to know where you’re coming from.

But that’s now how it works in life sometimes.

You may have the best intentions and put in your best effort, but there’re still going to have people who’d find a way to disagree with you, even from people you least expect from.

And the best thing to do is to stop focusing all our energies on them.

Just because a thorn stands out doesn’t mean we should purposely get pricked by it.

If you continuously focus on the negative, you’re only blinding yourself to the good stuff.

And to put it in very harsh terms, that’s entirely your own fault.

It is said that there’re no good or bad things in this world. It’s only your reaction towards them.

The friends who did not want to do the challenge bothered me for a while, but then I decided to just let it go and focus on other good people.

A few days later, another group of friends I’m closer to got together and did the challenge for me right here and here.

Yeah. It really made my day, especially the first video when they said, “We’re doing this in support of our boy Alden.”

People really do care for you and your cause. You just need to cover your ears to block out the noise and remember that that’s all they are, noise.

We shouldn’t have to keep feeling bad just because of a little noise.

I know, it’s cliché advice that we should focus on the positive and not the negative, but if you ask me, I think we’re fully allowed to feel great and as long as we want, just because we can!

I say, milk it. Milk all the positive energy you can. Live it up!

If we’re taught to always analyze and suck it up when it comes to disappointment and obstacles just to craft a few lessons, then I think there’s no reason why we can’t celebrate when something good happens.

Because if we can’t celebrate ourselves, then who’s going to do it for us?

If there was one ultimate lesson to all of this, I’d say that it’s about not playing the victim anymore. You don’t have to be in a position of needing help or a rescue before you realize that people care for you.

You’ve to take charge of your life. You can do anything you want. You might as well point it in the positive direction.

http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/lessons-from-shock-and-disappointment/

The Four Principles of Happiness

 

There comes a time in every person’s life when they have to decide if they are where they want to be or if they want to work towards getting to where they want to be. They also have to figure out if they even know what success truly is. I’ve had to examine these questions myself. Let’s talk about it.

How do we get to be where we want to be? What is success? Success is a subjective subject for most people. Some people consider success, having a job and being able to pay their bills, while others consider success, having a lot of money and other material things. Others, still, consider success living a social life with friends and loved ones.

Success is none of those things and all of those things, all at the same time. Real success comes in the form of happiness. Simply, if a person isn’t happy, they aren’t successful. One could even say that success is a byproduct of happiness. What is happiness, you may ask? It took me a long time to figure out the answer to that question. Like most things in life, discovering the answer was a process, it didn’t happen all at once.

It was six years after I graduated college. Up to this point, I had worked every miserable and, to me, demeaning job, I would want to work in one lifetime. Call centers, delivering pizzas, retail; jobs that made me want to tie a rope around my neck and step off of the bar stool. I had just been released from a big box retail chain and was in the job market for about two or three months. I happened upon an ad for a Network Administrator position. So, I applied for the job and got called for an interview. By this time, in my life, I had mastered how to do an interview, so I wasn’t nervous. Long story short, I got the job. It took me six long years to get a job in my field of study, but I did it.

This job came with it all. It was decent pay, I was doing what I wanted to do, and above all, I had my own office. I tell you what, it may not seem like much to some, but having your own office is where it’s at. Despite this, I still wasn’t happy. Sure, I enjoyed my work and didn’t have to worry about money, but these are external things. Happiness isn’t external, it’s internal. Discover the internal and it will become eternal.

I had to take a step back and stop looking at the outside circumstances and material aspect of life, and look inside myself. Most days, I hate myself. I don’t hold myself in high esteem. As a result, I hate everyone around me. Sometimes, I look at others and become envious of what they have, whether it be looks, money, power, whatever. This mentality, obviously, is the antithesis of happiness.

In order to be happy, you have to understand a number of things, I’ll call these The Four Principles of Happiness:

1. Life and being are two different things.

Being is a constant. We are human beings. This means that we will be who we are, no matter what happens. Life is a variable. In our lives, unexpected things happen all the time. We can’t prepare for everything. What we can do is not let life affect our being. When we do that, we upset the applecart and everything becomes frustrating. Life is the waves in the ocean of being. Sometimes, that ocean is calm and other times there are storms brewing. Keep yourself calm and take those waves until waters are calm again and continue to sail on.

2. You can only control yourself.

This might seem like common sense, but to some it’s not. Namely, me. For a lot of people, a huge amount of stress can be alleviated by understanding this principle. If someone spends their life trying to control someone else, they are living a life of futility. When I came to realize and accept that I can only dictate my own actions and not somebody else, it felt like the weight of the world had been lifted off of my shoulders. This can come in many forms: spouses trying to control the other spouse, parents trying to control children, friends trying to control other friends. At the end of the day, people are going to do what they are going to do. Only you are going to do what you want to do, so just focus on that and really, that’s all that is important.

3. Understand stress.

Notice I didn’t say avoid stress. In a fantasy world, there is no stress and everyone lives happily ever after. Here’s something that will blow your hair back, though, we don’t live in a fantasy world. Also, avoiding stress will just end up causing more stress. The key to stress, is to understand it and embrace it. When you are at the point of knowing what stress is, accepting it, and being able to deal with it accordingly, it no longer feels like stress. If you want to talk about bliss, some would consider not feeling stress, pure bliss. I’m saying this matter of factly, in truth, this is a hard concept to master. Buddhists spend their lives practicing this philosophy of nirvana, so don’t expect it to come easily. I’m still learning how to deal with it.

4. Happiness is for everyone.

Some people think that they will never find happiness. As long as someone thinks that, it will be true. Everyone should know that they are entitled to happiness and if they follow the guidelines that I’ve talked about and numerous other people have talked about, they can achieve it. It’s not easy, and it’s not going to happen overnight. You have to keep working at it, like anything. Just like those six years I kept trying to get a job doing what I thought I wanted to do, keep chiseling away at the things that keep you from reaching an understanding and happiness that few people know exist.

Happiness is not always having a smile on your face, but a complete understanding of self and the surrounding. Achieving this kind of happiness that I have described, true happiness, will lead you on a path of assured success. It is a powerful realization. One that is synonymous with understanding yourself and everything around you. I think that meditation is a great tool for attaining this universal consciousness. Reading and being open minded are another set of great tools. Whatever you choose to do on your journey is up to you, just know that anything is possible if you wish it so.

http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/four-principles-happiness/

WHO IS ‘LOUISE L. HAY?’

 

RECENTLY DUBBED "the closest thing to a living saint" by the Australian media, Louise L. Hay is also known as one of the founders of the self-help movement. Her first book, Heal Your Body, was published in 1976, long before it was fashionable to discuss the connection between the mind and body. Revised and expanded in 1988, this best-selling book introduced Louise's concepts to people in 33 different countries and has been translated into 25 languages throughout the world.

Through Louise’s healing techniques and positive philosophy, millions have learned how to create more of what they want in their lives, including more wellness in their bodies, minds, and spirits. Her own personal philosophy was forged from her tormented upbringing. Her childhood was unstable and impoverished, and her teen years were marked by abuse. Louise ran away from home and ended up in New York City, where she became a model and married a prosperous businessman. Although it appeared that her life had turned around, it was not until the marriage ended 14 years later that her healing really began.

Louise started what would become her life's work in New York City in 1970. She attended meetings at the Church of Religious Science and began training in the ministerial program. She became a popular speaker at the church, and soon found herself counseling clients. This work quickly blossomed into a full-time career. After several years, Louise compiled a reference guide detailing the mental causes of physical ailments, and developed positive thought patterns for reversing illness and creating health. This compilation was the basis for Heal Your Body, also known affectionately as "the little blue book." She began traveling throughout the United States, lecturing and facilitating workshops on loving ourselves and healing our lives.

Louise was able to put her philosophies into practice when she was diagnosed with cancer. She considered the alternatives to surgery and drugs, and instead developed an intensive program of affirmations, visualization, nutritional cleansing, and psychotherapy. Within six months, she was completely healed of cancer.

 

In 1980, Louise moved back to her native Southern California, and it was here that she began putting her workshop methods on paper. In 1984, her new book, You Can Heal Your Life, was published. In it, Louise explains how our beliefs and ideas about ourselves are often the cause of our emotional problems and physical maladies and how, by using certain tools, we can change our thinking and our lives for the better.

You Can Heal Your Life reached the New York Times bestseller list and remained on it for 13 consecutive weeks. More than 50 million copies of You Can Heal Your Life have been sold throughout the world. Twenty years later, due to her appearances on the Oprah Winfrey Show, You Can Heal Your Life was again on the New York Times bestseller list. The first time in that publication’s history that has happened!

In 1985, Louise began her famous support group, "The Hayride," with six men diagnosed with AIDS. By 1988, the group had grown to a weekly gathering of 800 people and had moved to an auditorium in West Hollywood. Once again, Louise had started a movement of love and support long before people began to wear red ribbons in their lapels. It was during this time that she wrote The AIDS Book: Creating a Positive Approach, based on her experiences with this powerful group.

Louise now heads Hay House, a successful publishing company. What began as a small venture in the living room of her home has turned into a prosperous corporation that has sold millions of books and tapes worldwide. Hay House authors include many notables in the self-help movement, including Wayne Dyer, Joan Borysenko, and Doreen Virtue, among others. In addition, The Hay Foundation is a non-profit organization established by Louise that encourages and financially supports diverse organizations which supply food, shelter, counseling, hospice care and money to those with Aids, battered women and other crises.

At 81, Louise released her first-ever film on her life and work You Can Heal Your Life: The Movie. To watch the trailer visit www.youcanhealyourlifemovie.com. She continues to lecture around the world, recently returning from trips to Great Britain, Australia and Canada. When she’s not traveling, Louise enjoys painting, gardening, and dancing at her home in San Diego, California.

4 ways to develop the skill of Patience (for yourself and others)

In the fast paced world we live in, people are finding it harder to cultivate (and master) the skill of patience.

We're so used to obtaining and consuming things on demand, that we sometimes forget why we need to harvest this skill in the first place.

But did you know that every time you become upset or agitated because somebody else delayed you or made you wait, you're actually only torturing yourself?

And when you're stuck in a moment of frenzy and stress, you're unable to accomplish anything.

I'm no stranger to impatience myself, but I've come to appreciate and develop the important skill of patience with practice and commitment.

Now, I know that it can be challenging to master, which is why I've gathered 4 very simple but powerful ways to help you develop the skill of patience with yourself and others...

1. Recognize your impatience.
Do you have a tendency to do things fast, even when you're not in a rush? Are you the kind of person that wants things done immediately? Or perhaps you get easily annoyed if people don't immediately get what you're saying?

If you're nodding right now, don't worry. Acknowledging the situation is the first step towards developing deeper patience.

Tip: If it's a person who is challenging your patience skills, become aware, stop and take a few deep breaths if you start to feel upset. If it's a situation that's challenging your patience, choose to enjoy the view, watch the people around you or listen to your favorite song.

Remember that getting impatient won't make things move any faster, so why stress out for nothing?

2. Look into the source of your impatience.
Think about it for a second... exactly why do you feel rushed in the first place? Could it be that you're trying to do more things than you possibly can?

Tip: Make sure to plan your day well and not schedule in more things than you can accomplish in the time you have. Also, nourishing yourself and staying healthy will help you get to where you want to go and keep you calm and connected.

3. Practice delayed gratification.
A wise person once said: 'A pleasure delayed is a pleasure enhanced'.

Tip: So before rushing for dessert or buying your tenth pair of designer sunglasses, pause and think about it first. Maybe you don't need it or want it that badly after all. This is a great and easy way to practice patience.

4. Think before you speak.
Have you ever said something that you regretted afterwards? At times, we say things without considering the consequences. We say the first thing that comes to our head and we end up offending others.

Tip: The key here is to be patient, pause and go over what you want to say. I know this may be easier said than done, but practice makes perfect.

Also, consider that in order to lose weight, to be successful, heal from illness or achieve any goal in life, you must be patient and therefore, it's important to master this skill.

Now, if you're working towards a goal in life right now, and you've been very patient at reaching it but still found it hard to achieve, then you're going to love this amazing, helpful tool that I just stumbled upon...

whatever block is standing in your way from experiencing success and happiness right now.



http://www.mindmovies.com/blogroll/post.php?id=153

7 Steps to Turn Your Self-Improvement Desires Into Reality

“Reality leaves a lot to the imagination.” - John Lennon

 

 

 

How many times have we told ourselves in complete earnestness, “I’m going to be more organized and productive from now on.”? Or that the diet starts tomorrow? Or that we’re going to make a real effort to exercise now?

Only to have that enthusiasm fizzle away, and all our best intentions come to nothing?

It’s the most common thing in the world (besides bacteria) — the honest and fervent desire for self-improvement, followed by inaction or giving in to temptations, followed by guilt or giving up. Bridget Jones captured it best, writing her constant resolutions into her diary. “Will definitely go to the gym this afternoon.” Only to be followed by a binge of pastries followed by drinking and smoking.

We’re all Bridget Jones. It happens to the best of us. It’s inertia at work, mixed with a bit of laziness as well as the very human trait of giving in to desires despite all the good intentions in the world.

So how do we beat inertia and temptations? Four basic ways, really:

1. Get moving, a bit at a time. Inertia is beat only by movement. Once you get going, momentum builds up and inertia is no longer a factor. So the key is to get started, and you do that not by trying to go from 0 to 60 in 5 seconds, but by trying to go from 0 to 5mph in a day or two. That’s doable. It’s all about baby steps. Once you get going, you’re golden.
2. Be accountable. Laziness, the second culprit, is beat by a bit of public pressure. We all get lazy from time to time (or, to be more honest, all the time), and there’s nothing wrong with that. But to beat laziness, we must apply a bit of pressure, in the form of accountability. There’s nothing wrong with a little pressure, as long is it’s not overdone. Pressure is a motivating thing, especially when it’s positive. Positive pressure includes encouragement from family or friends, an online forum, a help group in your neighborhood, or the readers of your blog.
3. Ignore failures — giving in to temptation is OK. We will always give in to temptation. Plan for it, accept it, move on. There’s no need to beat yourself up.
4. Motivate yourself. Most importantly, you want to really want it. It’s not enough to feel pressure to do something — you have to really desire it. I mean, really desire it, not just think it’s something you should do, or that you’ll be a better person for doing it. If pressure gives you the push toward your goal, motivation gives you the pull.

Given those strategies for beating the obstacles to making your desires become reality … how do we implement them? How do we go from theory to actual action steps? Easy. Seven simple steps, that you can do today. Really. Do them today.

1. Make a date. Right now. All the good intentions in the history of the universe mean nothing if you don’t actually get started. And the only way to get started is to take action, right now. Not tomorrow, not later today, not in an hour, not when you finish reading this article. Right now! Look at your calendar, and make an appointment to create your action plan, or to take the first action (“Go walking at 5:30 p.m. today in the park,” for example). What’s the first action you can take to make your desires a reality? Create a healthier meal plan for tomorrow? Create a place for everything you use at work, so your organizing system doesn’t fall apart in two day? Decide what that is and make an appointment for it, right now. Second part of this step: make that appointment the most important appointment on your schedule, more important than a doctor’s appointment or a meeting with your boss.

2. Set a small, achievable goal. Remember, inertia is a powerful force. If you haven’t been exercising for a couple years, it’s hard to get started. You’re used to the way things are, and even if you want to change, it’s difficult. So don’t start out trying to conquer the world. Just conquer something exceedingly small. It might sound wimpy to say, “I’m going to walk for 10 minutes” or “I’m going to do 10 pushups and 1 chinup”, but those are much more likely to beat inertia than, “I’m going to exercise for 45 minutes today.” Be realistic, and make it very very achievable. It’s the only way to beat inertia.

“Try not. Do or do not. There is no try.” - Yoda in The Empire Strikes Back

3. Commit thyself, big time. It’s this commitment that will keep you going after you overcome inertia. Sometimes we get filled up with enthusiasm, but then a few days later, that enthusiasm wanes and we submit to our old buddy laziness. Now, I’m not anti-laziness — just the opposite, I assure you — but we can’t let it stop us from making our dreams come true. So instead, make a commitment, publicly. State your small, achievable goal, and tell it to as many people as you can. Call or email friends and family, tell all your coworkers, join an online forum related to your goal and tell all of them. Put it on your blog. However you do it, make sure people are aware of your goal, and that there’s sufficient pressure to overcome laziness.

4. Baby steps, baby. Again, inertia is a very strong force. I’ve said it before, but this is a very important step here: the best way to change is through baby steps. One small step at a time. Don’t try to bite off too much. How is this different from the above step, setting a small and achievable goal? It’s the same concept, but extended beyond the initial goal. It’s taking things one little goal at a time, a bit at a time. For example, let’s say you want to run a marathon, but currently your running regimen consists of running to the bathroom during commercial breaks while you’re watching Lost. So do you go out and start a marathon training plan? Nope. You start by walking 10 minutes a day. Then, when that becomes a habit and too easy, walk 15 minutes. Then 20, then 30. Then jog a minute, walk a couple minutes, jog a minute, and so on, for those 30 minutes. Then jog 90 seconds, and so on, until you’re running for 30 minutes. Do these steps a week or two at a time, so that all of a sudden, you’re running for 45 minutes every other day … and you barely noticed the progression. That’s the way you get to a goal … small progressions that are barely noticeable. Not by killing yourself the first day out.

“Seventy percent of success in life is showing up.” - Woody Allen

5. Hold thyself accountable. You’ve committed yourself publicly … but it’s not enough to tell people your goal. You have to make it clear that they must hold you accountable to reporting to them your progress. Then report your progress to them regularly. Daily is better than weekly. Reporting to them makes sure that you will think twice about being lazy and forgoing your action plan.

6. Motivate yourself. We’ve already discussed accountability and commitment, which are ways to put positive pressure on yourself — a form of motivation. Those are great, but you also want other types of motivation. You want to find ways to make your progress feel great … either through rewards, or the positive way you feel about your progress, or the positive way you feel when others see how well you’re doing. Find a few different ways to motivate yourself — the more the better. Incorporate these into your plan. Tell people about them. Let them help push you along.

7. Just keep doing it, no matter what. You’ll encounter obstacles, and falter and fall. Just get up and keep going. You’ll face temptations and give in. That’s OK. Just keep going. You’ll make mistakes and get discouraged. No matter … just keep going. Learn from your mistakes, and … keep going. No matter what happens, keep going. If you’re taking baby steps, you’re holding yourself accountable, and you’re actually doing something, you’ll get there.

“Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one” - Albert Einstein

 

 

 

http://zenhabits.net/7-steps-to-turn-your-self-improvement-desires-into-reality/

 

 

 

 

http://zenhabits.net/7-steps-to-turn-your-self-improvement-desires-into-reality/

The Inspiration of Certain Words and Their Life-Changing Capacities

Many people go through life unable to express their innermost feelings in words. On top of that, many people are shy and fearful, which causes them to be unable to express the right words at the right moments when the will mean the most.

Words are very powerful, especially when they are spoken at just the right moment. Many go through life totally oblivious to the fact that they could accomplish many of their goals just by using the right words. But the truth is all that's needed is to use them in the right way.

Consider this, words spoken in anger and carelessness can cause someone to be traumatized, which can permanently affect them for a lifetime. On the other hand, encouraging words and compliments given to someone can boost that person's confidence and give them the stamina to face life's difficulties for years to come.

Most assuredly, words can be very influential, and that's why you can use them to improve your own self-esteem as well as the overall quality of your life.

Boosting your self-confidence with words aren't those that come from other people. Write these words down and speak them to yourself. They are referred to as "affirmations." They are easy to create and simple to use, but they can be most effective in raising your self-confidence.

To start out with, zero in on the areas of your life that you're not quite satisfied with and you feel like they need to be improved. For example, if you're not happy with certain things about your looks, then focus on something that you ARE pleased with. Perhaps you feel like a bit of weight loss would help you, but you have a very attractive face. Focus on that fabulous smile.

Now, put yourself into a routine, every morning when you get up and every night when you go to bed, take time to look at yourself in the mirror and say something like, "I have a beautiful smile and this smile is what everyone is going to see when they look at me. My fabulous smile is going to attract the people I want in my life." Of course, making it more personal might help more.

Affirmations are essential to help you at remembering that there ARE some very appealing qualities about you and that they are the ones you need to draw attention to. When you're confident about something and can make use of that confidence, you'll find that people will suddenly WANT to be around you because you illuminate such great vibes. In other words, it will draw their focus away from the fact that you are carrying around a few extra pounds. People flock to those who flash a great smile and radiate an open-hearted personality.

There are great looking guys that have intimate relationships with women that are less than a desirable 10, but yet their lack of first-rate beauty hasn't stopped them. They've found a way to bring out their inner beauty. You can do the same. All you need to do is a little psychological reinforcing. Write down all the affirmations that relate to what you want to accomplish. Recite them as often as you need.

The more positive energy that you put out the more will return to you, before long that gorgeous smile will be the only thing you'll be aware of and those extra pounds will be in the back of your mind, where you can get to it later. This approach can work the same way with anything that you want to change about yourself.

http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Duane_Birth

42 Practical Ways To Improve Yourself

42 Practical Ways To Improve Yourself

 

Are you someone who likes to grow? Do you constantly seek to improve yourself and become better?

If you do, then we have something in common. I’m very passionate about personal growth. It was just 4 years ago when I discovered my passion for growing and helping others grow. At that time, I was 22 and in my final year of university. As I thought about the meaning of life, I realized there was nothing more meaningful than to pursue a life of development and betterment. It is through improving ourselves that we get the most out of life.

SEE ALSO: How to Better Yourself One Day at a Time

After 1.5 years of actively pursuing growth and helping others to grow through my personal development blog, I realize there is never an end to the journey of self improvement. The more I grow, the more I realize there is so much out there I don’t know, so much that I have to learn. For sure, there is always something about ourselves we can improve on. The human potential is limitless, so it’s impossible to reach a point of no growth. Whenever we think we are good, we can be even better.

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As a passionate advocate of growth, I’m continuously looking for ways to self-improve. I’ve compiled 42 of my best tips which might be helpful in your personal growth journey. Some of them are simple steps which you can engage in immediately. Some are bigger steps which takes conscious effort to act on. Here they are:

1.    Read a book every day. Books are concentrated sources of wisdom. The more books you read, the more wisdom you expose yourself to. What are some books you can start reading to enrich yourself? Some books I’ve read and found useful are Think and Grow Rich, Who Moved My Cheese, 7 Habits, The Science of Getting Rich and Living the 80/20 Way. I’ve heard positive reviews for The Tipping Point, Outliers and The Difference Maker, so I’ll be checking them out soon.

2.    Learn a new language. As a Singaporean Chinese, my main languages are English, Mandarin and Hokkien (a Chinese dialect). Out of interest, I took up language courses in the past few years such as Japanese and Bahasa Indonesian. I realized learning a language is a whole new skill altogether and the process of acquainting with a new language and culture is a totally a mind-opening experience.

3.    Pick up a new hobby. Beyond just your usual favorite hobbies, is there something new you can pick up? Any new sport you can learn? Examples are fencing, golf, rock climbing, football, canoeing, or ice skating. Your new hobby can also be a recreational hobby. For example, pottery, Italian cooking, dancing, wine appreciation, web design, etc.  Learning something new requires you to stretch yourself in different aspects, whether physically, mentally or emotionally.

4.    Take up a new course. Is there any new course you can join? Courses are a great way to gain new knowledge and skills. It doesn’t have to be a long-term course – seminars or workshops serve their purpose too. I’ve been to a few workshops and they have helped me gain new insights which I had not considered before.

5.    Create an inspirational room. Your environment sets the mood and tone for you. If you are living in an inspirational environment, you are going to be inspired every day. In the past, I didn’t like my room at all because I thought it was messy and dull. A few years ago, I decided this was the end of it – I started on a “Mega Room Revamp” project and overhauled my room. The end result? A room I totally relish being in and inspires me to be at my peak every day.

6.    Overcome your fears. All of us have fears. Fear of uncertainty, fear of public speaking, fear of risk… All our fears  keep us in the same position and prevent us from growing. Recognize that your fears reflect areas where you can grow. I always think of fears as the compass for growth. If I have a fear about something, it represents something I’ve yet to address, and addressing it helps me to grow.

7.    Level up your skills. If you have played video games before especially RPGs, you’ll know the concept of leveling up – gaining experience so you can be better and stronger. As a blogger, I’m constantly leveling up my writing skills. As a speaker, I’m constantly leveling up my public engagement abilities. What skills can you level up?

8.    Wake up early. Waking up early (say, 5-6am) has been acknowledged by many (Anthony Robbins, Robin Sharma, among other self-help gurus) to improve your productivity and your quality of life. I feel it’s because when you wake up early, your mindset is already set to continue the momentum and proactively live out the day. Seth recently wrote a waking up early series which you should check out to help cultivate this habit.

9.    Have a weekly exercise routine. A better you starts with being in better physical shape. I personally make it a point to jog at least 3 times a week, at least 30 minutes each time. You may want to mix it up with jogging, gym lessons and swimming for variation.

 

10. Start your life handbook. A life handbook is an idea I started 3 years ago. Basically, it’s a book which contains the essentials on how you can live your life to the fullest, such as your purpose, your values and goals. Sort of like your manual for your life. I started my life handbook since 2007 and it’s been a crucial enabler in my progress.

11. Write a letter to your future self. What do you see yourself as 5 years from now? Will you be the same? Different?  What kind of person will you be? Write a letter to your future self – 1 year from now will be a good start – and seal it. Make a date in your calendar to open it 1 year from now. Then start working to become the person you want to open that letter.

12. Get out of your comfort zone. Real growth comes with hard work and sweat. Being too comfortable doesn’t help us grow – it makes us stagnate. What is your comfort zone? Do you stay in most of the time? Do you keep to your own space when out with other people? Shake your routine up. Do something different. By exposing yourself to a new context, you’re literally growing as you learn to act in new circumstances.

13. Put someone up to a challenge. Competition is one of the best ways to grow. Set a challenge (weight loss, exercise, financial challenge, etc) and compete with an interested friend to see who achieves the target first. Through the process, both of you will gain more than if you were to set off on the target alone.

14. Identify your blind spots. Scientifically, blind spots refer to areas our eyes are not capable of seeing. In personal development terms, blind spots are things about ourselves we are unaware of. Discovering our blind spots help us discover our areas of improvement. One exercise I use to discover my blind spots is to identify all the things/events/people that trigger me in a day – trigger meaning making me feel annoyed/weird/affected. These represent my blind spots. It’s always fun to do the exercise because I discover new things about myself, even if I may already think I know my own blind spots (but then they wouldn’t be blind spots would they?). After that, I work on steps to address them.

15. Ask for feedback. As much as we try to improve, we will always have blind spots. Asking for feedback gives us an additional perspective. Some people to approach will be friends, family, colleagues, boss, or even acquaintances, since they will have no preset bias and can give their feedback objectively.

16. Stay focused with to-do lists. I start my day with a list of tasks I want to complete and this helps make me stay focused. In comparison, the days when I don’t do this end up being extremely unproductive. For example, part of my to-do list for today is to write a guest post at LifeHack.Org, and this is why I’m writing this now! Since my work requires me to use my computer all the time, I use Free Sticky Notes to manage my to-do lists. It’s really simple to use and it’s a freeware, so I recommend you check it out.

17. Set Big Hairy Audacious Goals (BHAGs). I’m a big fan of setting BHAGs. BHAGs stretch you beyond your normal capacity since they are big and audacious – you wouldn’t think of attempting them normally. What are BHAGs you can embark on, which you’ll feel absolutely on top of the world once you complete them? Set them and start working on them.

18. Acknowledge your flaws. Everyone has flaws. What’s most important is to understand them, acknowledge them, and address them. What do you think are your flaws? What are the flaws you can work on now? How do you want to address them?

19. Get into action. The best way to learn and improve is to take action. What is something you have been meaning to do? How can you take action on it immediately? Waiting doesn’t get anything done. Taking action gives you immediate results to learn from.

20. Learn from people who inspire you. Think about people you admire. People who inspire you. These people reflect certain qualities you want to have for yourself too. What are the qualities in them you want to have for yourself? How can you acquire these qualities?

21. Quit a bad habit. Are there any bad habits you can lose? Oversleeping? Not exercising? Being late? Slouching? Nail biting? Smoking? Here’s some help on how you can quit a bad habit.

22. Cultivate a new habit. Some good new habits to cultivate include reading books (#1), waking up early (#8), exercising (#9), reading a new personal development article a day (#40) and meditating. Is there any other new habit you can cultivate to improve yourself?

23. Avoid negative people. As Jim Rohn says, “You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with”. Wherever we go, there are bound to be negative people. Don’t spend too much of your time around them if you feel they drag you down.

24. Learn to deal with difficult people. There are times when there are difficult people you can’t avoid, such as at your workplace, or when the person is part of your inner circle of contacts. Learn how to deal with them. These people management skills will go a long way in working with people in the future.

25. Learn from your friends. Everyone has amazing qualities in them. It’s up to how we want to tap into them. With all the friends who surround you, they are going to have things you can learn from. Try thinking of a good friend right now. Think about just one quality they have which you want to adopt. How can you learn from them and adopt this skill for yourself? Speak to them if you need to – for sure, they will be more than happy to help!

26. Start a journal. Journaling is a great way to gain better self-awareness. It’s a self-reflection process. As you write, clarify your thought process and read what you wrote from a third person’s perspective, you gain more insights about yourself. Your journal can be private or an online blog. I use my personal development blog as a personal journal too and I’ve learned a lot about myself through the past year of blogging.

27. Start a blog about personal development. To help others grow, you need to first be walking the talk. There are expectations of you, both from yourself and from others, which you have to uphold. I run The Personal Excellence Blog, where I share my personal journey and insights on how to live a better life. Readers look toward my articles to improve themselves, which enforces to me that I need to keep improving, for myself and for the people I’m reaching out to.

28. Get a mentor or coach. There’s no faster way to improve than to have someone work with you on your goals. Many of my clients approach me to coach them in their goals and they achieve significantly more results than if they had worked alone.

29. Reduce the time you spend on chat programs. I realized having chat programs open at default result in a lot of wasted time. This time can be much better spent on other activities. The days when I don’t get on chat, I get a lot more done. I usually disable the auto start-up option in the chat programs and launch them when I do want to chat and really have the time for it.

30. Learn chess (or any strategy game). I found chess is a terrific game to learn strategy and hone your brainpower. Not only do you have fun, you also get to exercise your analytical skills. You can also learn strategy from other board games or computer games, such as Othello, Chinese Chess, WarCraft, and so on.

31. Stop watching TV. I’ve not been watching TV for pretty much 4 years and it’s been a very liberating experience. I realized most of the programs and advertisements on mainstream TV are usually of a lower consciousness and not very empowering. In return, the time I’ve freed up from not watching TV is now constructively used for other purposes, such as connecting with close friends, doing work I enjoy, exercising, etc.

32. Start a 30-day challenge. Set a goal and give yourself 30 days to achieve this. Your goal can be to stick with a new habit or something you’ve always wanted to do but have not. 30 days is just enough time to strategize, plan, get into action, review and nail the goal.

33. Meditate. Meditation helps to calm you and be more conscious. I also realized that during the nights when I meditate (before I sleep), I need lesser sleep. The clutter clearing process is very liberating.

34. Join Toastmasters (Learn public speaking). Interestingly, public speaking is the #1 fear in the world, with #2 being death. After I started public speaking as a personal development speaker/trainer, I’ve learned a lot about how to communicate better, present myself and engage people. Toastmasters is an international organization that trains people in public speaking. Check out the Toastmaster clubs nearest to you here.

35. Befriend top people in their fields. These people have achieved their results because they have the right attitudes, skill sets and know-how. How better to learn than from the people who have been there and done that? Gain new insights from them on how you can improve and achieve the same results for yourself.

36. Let go of the past. Is there any grievance or unhappiness from the past which you have been holding on? If so, it’s time to let it go. Holding on to them prevents you from moving on and becoming a better person. Break away from the past, forgive yourself, and move on. Just recently, I finally moved on from a past heartbreak of 5 years ago. The effect was liberating and very empowering, and I have never been happier.

37. Start a business venture. Is there anything you have an interest in? Why not turn it into a venture and make money while learning at the same time? Starting a new venture requires you to be learn business management skills, develop business acumen and have a competitive edge. The process of starting and developing my personal development business has equipped me with many skills, such as self-discipline, leadership, organization and management.

38. Show kindness to people around you. You can never be too kind to someone. In fact, most of us don’t show enough kindness to people around us. Being kind helps us to cultivate other qualities such as compassion, patience, and love. As you get back to your day after reading this article later on, start exuding more kindness to the people around you, and see how they react. Not only that, notice how you feel as you behave kindly to others. Chances are, you will feel even better than yourself.

39. Reach out to the people who hate you. If you ever stand for something, you are going to get haters. It’s easy to hate the people who hate us. It’s much more challenging to love them back. Being able to forgive, let go and show love to these people requires magnanimity and an open heart. Is there anyone who dislikes or hates you in your life? If so, reach out to them. Show them love. Seek a resolution and get closure on past grievances. Even if they refuses to reciprocate, love them all the same. It’s much more liberating than to hate them back.

40. Take a break. Have you been working too hard? Self-improvement is also about recognizing our need to take a break to walk the longer mile ahead. You can’t be driving a car if it has no petrol. Take some time off for yourself every week. Relax, rejuvenate and charge yourself up for what’s up ahead.

41. Read at least 1 personal development article a day. Some of my readers make it a point to read at least one personal development article every day, which I think is a great habit. There are many terrific personal development blogs out there, some of which you can check here.

42. Commit to your personal growth. I can be writing list articles with 10 ways, 25 ways, 42 ways or even 1,000 ways to improve yourself, but if you’ve no intention to commit to your personal growth, it doesn’t matter what I write. Nothing is going to get through. We are responsible for our personal growth – not anyone else. Not your mom, your dad, your friend, me or LifeHack. Make the decision to commit to your personal growth and embrace yourself to a life-long journey of growth and change. Kick off your growth by picking a few of the steps above and working on them. The results may not be immediate, but I promise you that as long as you keep to it, you’ll start seeing positive changes in yourself and your life.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this article or anything about personal growth. Feel free to share your thoughts in a comment below and I’ll get back to you! If you have any other suggestions to add to the list, please share with us too!

Celestine Chua

Image © kevindooley

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